Good European Dad. By Matthias Schmidt.

Just discovered my 19 year old daughter has an OnlyFans account

I was devastated

She clearly must not be registered as a sole proprietor with the the German Trade Office

I sat her down and asked how much she’d made

She said €4,200

I nearly collapsed

That’s at least €1,890 in unreported VAT obligations

She started crying but I did the only thing a good father could do

We spent the entire weekend filling out forms together

She’s now fully compliant with a business registration and tax ID

Makes €340/month after taxes and social contributions

I’ve never been more proud of her

Only 19 and already an online entrepreneur

She has a bright future ahead of her.

And they say that satire is not allowed in Germany.