White House Announces Illegal Immigration Has Decreased 90 Percent Since They Redefined It. By the Babylon Bee.

“The President’s policy of making up fake words, definitions, and stats has had a real, positive impact at the border,” said black gay Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre. “Since reality itself bends to the will of whoever has the power to define it, we have been able to decrease illegal immigration drastically. We just decided that. With our words. Hooray for us!” …

At publishing time, the administration had also announced a record 100% approval rating after redefining the meaning of the word “approve.”

The newspaper of record hits the bullseye again. So truthy.