Biden Administration Mounts Daring Mission To Evacuate Hunter’s Remaining Cash From Ukraine. By the Babylon Bee.

As Russian troops assemble at Ukraine’s border ahead of a possible land invasion, President Biden has taken swift action by deploying an elite seal team to evacuate his son Hunter’s money.

“At my direction, military operatives infiltrated a bank to evacuate my son’s stash of sweet, sweet Burisma cash before Russia murdered everyone. I didn’t want to risk that money falling into the wrong hands,” said Biden in a statement to congress. “Unfortunately, we haven’t been able to evacuate Americans from the country because I put all our resources on this operation. But make no mistake, we will leave no dollar behind.”