Mamas, Don’t Let Your Theybies Grow Up To Be Cowqueers

Mamas, Don’t Let Your Theybies Grow Up To Be Cowqueers, by Jim Goad.

In the tiny sheltered pampered enclaves of coastal American cities, some parents are refusing to reveal their children’s biological sex to anyone — including relatives and the infants themselves — until the toddler is old enough to decide for himself or herself. Instead of babies, they are calling their genderless spawn “theybies.”

Even stranger is the fact that they will act as if YOU’RE the weird one if you have a problem with that. They will act as if you’re some weird sort of pedophilic voyeur who is “obsessed” with their baby’s genitals, which is less likely than the idea that they are “unhappy” with their baby’s genitals — so unhappy, they have to tell the world about it.

(I will briefly detour to note the soul-scorching inanity of those who insist that “gender” and “sex” are two entirely different things, with the first purely cultural and the latter purely biological. It never seems to occur to these dolts that culture is an expression of biology, nor that throughout world history with very few exceptions, nearly all cultures just so happened to “assign” gender according to this “male/female binary” they’re insisting is rooted in bad ideas rather than penises and vaginas. To me, “gender” and “sex” might as well be synonymous, and anyone who insists otherwise has been tickled with goose feathers one too many times.) …

As their, um, “reasoning” goes, we live in a culture that is oppressive and downright suffocating for anyone in the microscopic minority of damaged fools who suffer the delusion that they’re a different sex than their genitals dictate, and in order to curb their astronomical rates of suicide and self-harm — which are, of course, entirely caused by the hateful and so-called “normal” cishet society rather than a nagging inner shame that they may be naturally damaged — it doesn’t matter if we make the 99.4% of people who suffer zero gender confusion as uncomfortable as possible. …

These terms [he, she, etc.] are based on anatomy. For some reason, every last one of you gender-dreamers seem to stub your toe on the hilariously simple fact that “she” is a term that has always meant nothing more and nothing less than “that person over there with the vagina.” …

Even though we all know that gender is a meaningless social construct, it turns out that those people whose job it is to randomly assign you a gender at birth are amazingly accurate. They’re right in over 99% of cases. What are the odds?

Read it all.